Wednesday, May 23, 2012

freely searching.

Welcome to the life of false anxiety attacks and toothy smiles.
I tried to find myself this year; tried and probably succeeded. 
I have gained this new thing called independence,
not just from the natural withdrawal of my parent's insurance, but from learning for myself.
My body can now function without manipulative strangers.
I'm Free.
When you find yourself alone in a crowded place, you learn to think for yourself.
And I did.
I know what happened from August to May,
me and my head introduced each other, and questions were answered,
and the rest of the world will never understand. 
Higher powers call it growth, and they encourage me to continue in my insight,
I'll make them proud.
My posterity can read my Journal entries from this past year,
I'll briefly read through my awkward phrases and redundant metaphors,
then i'll focus on the blank pages, where college boys and heavy books and english papers and burnt macaroni and grass stains and Sunday drives and expired bread and cleaning checks and reunion lunches will occupy the open spaces in my refreshed mind.
that sound's nice.

I'm a former hypochondriac and enjoy a good milkshake. 
or in other words,
I've found myself.

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